Tuesday, June 18, 2013

kind of blank :)

I'm blank, I don't know what to write! I should be panicking but I'm not because I know why I'm blank. Today I've had a good writing day, I've organised my thoughts, done some editing, done my synopsis of previous chapters and done some actual writing. It's a great feeling, my mind is calm, the script inside my head is more to the back, I can think and there is no pressure of words trying to get out.

Well there is, but it's the words in the story, not all the other words that get jumbled up. Because I've got my writing organised and got a big chunk of words and thoughts out, the rest of the mess in my head has room to move and I can think. And the werewolf story is falling into place inside my head. I can't see it yet but I know it's there. The facebook story is also cogitating, but it will have to wait a little longer. The pressure is to keep on with the werewolf story.

It's a little frustrating writing a book simply because it takes so long. I have glimpses of what is going to happen further on in the story but because I'm somewhat obsessive I feel compelled to write chronologically, like getting to the parts I can see in my head is my reward for writing the introductory parts. I'm impatient and impulsive, and writing means that I can indulge that a little, but I also have to restrain myself. It's necessary to remind myself that I am the only one who knows these characters, I have to make them real to the reader.

But today I have done the organisational work. I have to know what I have written, pivotal bits, so that I follow them to a logical end. To me, when reading a book, it is very frustrating to have something introduced and then never referred to again. So I have a chapter by chapter list of all the bits I have introduced so I can properly tie them in. Of course, being me, I usually don't keep that up to date, and today I did so I'm feeling very virtuous. And it is much better for me to have that to refer to, for obvious reasons. I have typed notes saved on my computer, printed out chapters with red lines all over them and notes in the margins for editing purposes, the story outline (which is very vague because I know it will change as I write - the characters always make sure of that), the character list with all their attributes that I know now and that will be added to as I go, a folder of glimpses of future events in case I lose them from my head, and the work in progress.

I know other authors have even more, some have a great big whiteboard, some have card files, goodness knows what others have. But this is what works for me, makes me feel like everything is in order and that means that my brain is free to let all these words line up on the page. It helps too to start with the right mindset. I can write regardless of my mood, but sometimes I delete everything I wrote for the first hour or so until my mood improves from the act of writing. But when I start writing already in a good mood the words flow so much more fluidly, the story comes together as I write both from my fingers and inside my head.

Today I started writing in an excellent mood. Sometimes days just seem perfect, the sun is brighter, the air is cleaner, and I feel like dancing in the aisles at Woolworths (and have been known to do this). Today was one of those perfect days, where I live in the moment just like I am always telling myself to do. I was smiling at random, and strangers were smiling back at me, and everything just seemed to go my way. Even on my walk around the Gooseponds with the dog (who lives every day in the moment of course) it seemed to be an especially perfect day. I saw a senior citizen driving one of those motorised scooters, and he was flying along on the little walking track. I didn't know those things could go so fast! He clearly had no fear of tipping over, and disappeared from sight in no time. He was obviously living in the moment as well (or running really really late for an appointment).

I usually sit in my back yard in the late afternoon, with a drink and some small snacks. The dog adores this time, and she has her own snacks which I dole out to her. My next door neighbour feeds the cockatoos and the ducks and the cockatoos sit in the big gum tree just behind my back fence and chat to each other. It's a nice time of the day and a good way to wind down. I can't do it every day, because on work days I don't get home until after 6pm and it's already dark, but I do enjoy the days that I can do it. It's like a little time out from the stresses of everyday life.

So today has really been an almost perfect day. It's been a day of good things, right from my perfectly brewed pot of tea on waking (some days I just get the ratio of tea leaves to water exactly right) to all the events of the day. Everything today has made me smile, a lot. Even the gamer child insisting on giving me a play by play description of his latest game (no idea, I tune him out in self defence) has failed to annoy me. Today has been one of those shining gems in the bead necklace day :)







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